The Garbage Truck

Change Therapy

David Pollay was in a New York City taxi cab and here’s what happened to him.

“I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed, and at the very last moment our car stopped just one inch from the other car’s back-end. I couldn’t believe it. But then I couldn’t believe what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face. And he even threw in a one finger salute!…

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Living Sanely in a Topsy-Turvey World

What a topsy-turvey world we’re living in – Lord, please come soon! Right is wrong and worshipping rebellion is king. If Christians defend Truth, professing “wait that’s against God’s Word!” we are vilified. Therefore the majority remain silent and fearful. Isn’t silence compliance? We allow that unknowing frog in the frying pan to get cooked without even realizing the frog is us.

“In those days there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes.” (Judges 21:25)

Even if I knew I could riot and break into an establishment, snatch money, merchandise, destroying and taking someone livelihood and get away with it, I wouldn’t! Have you noticed some condone this? People resort to crime and the police are supposed to be the bad guys? All of them??? (Isn’t that the definition of prejudice which the lawbreakers profess to hate?)

I don’t care what someone looks like – if they smile, are kind, courteous, I immediately want to be friends. If they are cruel, cantankerous, complaining, I avoid them. Choose your company wisely.

“Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good character.” (1 Corinthians 15:33)

May I ask you something? Do you like what you see around you? No? Then make changes, starting with the one in the mirror. Are you someone you’d like to be friends with? Do you exemplify a kind nature? Begin with one kindness a day and become the compassionate, decent human being God wants you to be!

Start allowing God control over your life. A happy person is a healthy person in mind, body and spirit.

Face it – it’s been a challenging year. Isolation has led to depression which has led to consuming comfort foods for energy and to mask loneliness, boredom and pain. It takes a lot of discipline to resist sugary treats which both energizes a boring, stay-at-home existence and calms the restless soul.

Now you’ve added at least ten pounds to your girth and you’re blaming the government and God for that too. Did it not occur to you that one can exercise inside the home, read a book, sew, paint, clean or write instead? It’s your choice. (I’ve used this time to complete one of my sequels and have 60,000 plus words on the next one.)

Even if I knew I could consume restaurant food every night, I wouldn’t do it. First I enjoy creating meals with my own hands. Secondly, I crave a healthy lifestyle for my husband and myself more than food.

As a nutritionist, I’ve seen what happens when people constantly eat unhealthy foods. Fatty foods simply make us sluggish. It takes longer (5-7 hours) to burn fat for energy. Unhealthy food creates an acidic pH which leads to heart disease, diabetes, high cholesterol, cancers and other illnesses. Is that your goal? “It’s my life, I’ll do what I want!” Okay . . . then own it. It’s your choice. Personally, I love God more than McBurgers and French fries. Don’t make food your idol.

Make healthy eating compliance easy. Anything is fine in moderation but primarily eat for nutrients!!! Fast food has very few nutrients but is awash in calories. Listen to your body and strive for a life filled with vitality, contentment and mental perceptiveness. A happy person doesn’t destroy other people’s property nor themselves!!!

“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” (Philippians 4:11)

Eyore or Pollyanna? Knowing Yourself in the Days of Corona

How are you facing the days of isolation amidst Corona Virus? With Fear?  Depression? Positivity? Gratefulness?

Use isolation as a time to reflect on how you react during challenges. Be Strong and Courageous!

A funny Facebook post proclaimed: “There are only 3 Ways to Come  out of this lockdown: a Hunk, a Chunk or a Drunk! Your Choice!”

This is meant to be cute, but in truth, it’s provides great insight in how we personally face adversity.

Be neither a Pollyanna nor an Eyore – be realistic.

A Hunk:

Some people are taking control and becoming more productive in this quiet isolation. They exercise, clean out closets, complete a project or fulfill another goal long discarded. I’m feverishly completing two fiction sequels while enjoying my plots and characters again.

Therefore, Become proactive!

Please stop any “victim mentality.” Stress kills! Turn your mind toward creating something productive. Step out in the fresh air, work to plant that garden, craft, read, create your own exercise area.

No excuses!!! One doesn’t need expensive equipment to be fit! I lift weights, plank, walk our dog, use stretch bands, etc. and have remained 18% body fat throughout. You can too, if you want it badly enough. Personally, I DO!

If you don’t, ask why? That’s a psychological issue and I’m here for you. Together with God’s Help we can conquer anything, even a virus. You’ll reemerge confident and strong. As Joshua proclaimed:

“Haven’t I commanded you: be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9) CSV   (even in the pantry!)

A Chunk?

It’s not unusual to run to comfort food during trying times. Food like chips, chocolate, mac and cheese, French fries, fried chicken, ice cream all release comforting endorphins which subliminally create memories of happier days.

My heart goes out especially to those who live with food addictions. Nothing like being imprisoned where all our favorites are!

When going to the grocery store is our only entertainment, strive to develop Herculean discipline and strong mental toughness.

“Instead, I discipline my body and bring it under strict control, so that after preaching to others, I myself will not be disqualified.” (1 Corinthians 9:27) CSV

A Drunk?

Sure, liquor makes the pain go away . . . for awhile. But then the heartaches return. I pray you haven’t lost one close to you during this epidemic. I can’t imagine the pain you must feel.

As a Christian, I know it’s even more important today to reach out to those who don’t know the Lord or where they are headed after they die. Believe it or not, dying from this virus is not the worse thing that can happen to you. Dying without Christ is!!!

“And they will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”(Matthew 25:46)

I urge you to face this time without fear!

Although I was touched by someone who tested positive for Covid-19 and faced strict quarantine, I was not fearful. I have done everything I know of to build up my immunity defenses.  My antioxidant armor and shield are strong but I know if God’s Will is that my time on Earth is done, I’ll still be in Good Hands.

Know Your enemy and build your defenses!

I’m sure the Israelites did all they could to strengthen their defenses before going into battle. Most of the time God protected them but not always. God knows the number of my days and when they are fulfilled, then I’m ready to go. Until then I ‘ll honor Him.  Luke 10:27

 

Braving Our Personal Storms in Life

As we sit here, enjoying a beautiful sunset over western Florida, escaping the wrath of Hurricane Dorian, I can’t help but wonder how many have cried out, “Why, God?” when destruction hits.

Why does God allow storms to enter our lives? How are we to deal with them?

Reflecting, I saw a comparison of personal godly storms and how we can get through them by trusting God.

God is Loving in spite of our rebellion

Twice in our married life we have turned from God, who brought us back through loving discipline. True, we suffered and are still reaping consequences but never have we complained it’s God’s Fault!!! In fact God graciously forgave our immaturity and we’ve learned from that experience. It’s helped us to counsel others because we’ve “been there.” We accepted the fact that we were far away from God’s Will and absolutely recognized we deserved more punishment than our loving LORD dished out.

Have you ever strayed from healthier eating? Of course, everyone has. When you did, what were the consequences? Stomach ache? Fatigue? Diabetes? Something worse? Well, did God force you to eat those double cheeseburgers – make you ill? No, we did it to ourselves and must accept the consequences. God however, graciously prepared a way of escape with wisdom, medications, exercise, healthier foods . . . and you know what? I bet you like yourself better when you eat better!

“The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” (1 Corinthians 10:13) LSV

As a father lovingly disciplines a child, God warns us, might even punish us for what we have done. Just look at King David and what resulted after his sin with Bathsheba. God doesn’t play favorites.

God sometimes creates storms to navigate us to safer ports.

Last year we were working in a toxic environment but prayed we could still make a difference. God loved us enough to prod us out of that unhealthy environment and to move us into a blessed Christian opportunity and lifestyle experience.

Sometimes we remain in an environment we shouldn’t. We settle for mediocrity. Nutritionally, have you ever thought, “Okay, one piece won’t harm me.” However one leads to another and suddenly it’s ten extra pounds gained. Don’t settle in a bad habit! God desires so much more for you.

Knowing God’s Word Prevent Storms

False prophets twist and turn God’s Word around making it sound better to anyone wanting to believe it. I saw this with politicians while working in public relations. They proclaimed promises the crowd wanted to hear. People who fall for these haven’t researched what Truth is! There’s little distinction between false prophets or false diet gurus. Know what you should believe and why. Do. Your. Research. Understanding physiology is important!

God is Good. He instilled in us common sense. Provided great nutritious foods to enjoy. Therefore eat what you desire in moderation. Avoid man-made, chemically-based foods most of the time, consume good fats and colorful food. If you crave a particular food, ask why. Are you physically hungry, sad, bored, lonely, stressed? Decide for yourself whether you are really hungry or simply emotional. Know yourself.

It’s not easy traveling a Christian path. Nor is it easy reaching a healthier goal. In nutrition no one wants to suffer, yet everyone wants a quick fix. There is no need to continuously sacrifice. Enjoy His Bounty and Stay Healthy in Body and Spirit.

The Uniqueness of You

When I asked my mother what she wanted for her birthday, she would always smile and answer softly, “Oh, peace and contentment.” Isn’t that what we all should strive for?

Becoming a New Creation means embracing the true you, even imperfections. How many are content and at peace with who they truly are? Those I counseled usually wanted to look like someone else, a celebrity or a prettier version of themselves. Few told me they wanted to be a healthier version of themselves.

I would patiently customize a sensible meal plan that would fit with a patient’s tastes, budget and particular lifestyle. Stressing, Eat for nutrients; eat anything in moderation . . .

Week after week, some would lose weight while others presented excuses; (unexpected company, special events, holidays, etc.) to justify their lousy week. I had provided practical applications to avoid those temptations, yet they failed to comply. I’ve heard every excuse. They weren’t fooling me; they were fooling themselves.

For if one has the will, they’ll find the way – if it’s something they truly want.

Even if I had a magic wand and could instantly turn them into a size two, I know they wouldn’t remain a size two for long, because there was something masking the true reason they weren’t getting healthy.

If this is you, figure out why you’ve self-destructed:

1. Whether it is one’s upbringing, “You better eat everything on your plate or NO DESERT for you!” – insecurity, shame, illness, circumstances – many eat for “masked” reasons. It might not even be a seemingly bad reason – some are simply happy or curious eaters and lose control. Someone, perhaps being poor growing up, subconsciously fears food won’t be there tomorrow.

2.  Occasionally it’s a medical reason. Illnesses and medications can slow metabolism, influence electrolyte and water balances. It’s extremely tough, but have patience. Consuming healthier foods; all while learning new habits is what I’d recommend until off medication and weight loss can begin.

3. Perhaps it’s psychosomatic; stress, emotional issues or perceived guilt denies success, especially when the mind believes it must protect itself. Reading positive books, exercising, fresh air, meditating, listening to soothing (or even rock) music can calm or invigorate.

4. Sometimes it’s physical challenges. If someone is big-boned, they’ll never become a comfortable size two, no matter how much they desire to. “To accept the things we cannot change,” is part of the serenity prayer. We are all unique and becoming the best creation you can be should be the goal, not lusting after a celebrity’s body shape or lifestyle. Focusing on unrealistic possibilities makes us miss out on so much in life!

I especially enjoy counseling when that aha moment appears. When a patient finally recognize why they act as they do. I know then, they’ll truly begin taking control of their health. Find yours!

Bottom line? Since we’re all unique there’s no “one-size-fits-all” reason for success or failure. We are all individuals with different needs and desires. Know yourself as God knows you. For Psalm 139: 13-16 professes:

For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.  (ESV)

God knows you are unique and loved. He created you. Love back – honor your earthly temple.

“I want it, I want it!!!” But Should You Have It?

We are a demanding culture today, are we not?

Currently we have no children living at home but we do have something just as challenging: “Mr. No-No”

That little dog has a myriad of toys to choose from but never seems satisfied with what is right in front of him! I am perpetually putting his toys back in his box. He brings them out but gets bored quickly.

When we allowed him to choose from several items, he sticks his nose up at them and demands a new chewy or toy. Instead of getting what he want, he gets a trip to “time-out.”

Aren’t we the same? We live in such a materialistic society that keeping up with the Joneses and acquiring more toys is the goal. We never stop to enjoy the bounty God has already given us. When we act spoiled rotten, sometimes God has to give us a “time-out” too. It’s called a reality check.

According to Psalm 37:4, God says He’ll give us the desires of our heart: “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

What do we want? Perhaps a grilled steak every night? A larger home, better job, a spa day, a Maserati, to win the lottery? Whatever. But whatever it is, we want it now!!!

God is not a vending machine! Nor will He give bad things to His children. Just because we want it however, doesn’t mean it good for us! Perhaps we’d better read the next verse:

“Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act,” (Psalm 37:5)

Our hearts must be right. We shouldn’t have selfish motives and expect God to deliver. God knows that spoiling a child isn’t good in the long run. Giving in to a child will only create a habitually demanding adult who no one enjoys being around.

We live as we learn.

When I young and we were dirt poor farm kids, dinner was placed on the table and we got to eat what was on our plate and we better like it!!! One of our Mom’s favorite expressions was, “You can have anything you want . . .  and this is what you want.”

We learned to appreciate fresh vegetables, fresh air and one more thing: fresh thinking. It wasn’t recycled robotic thinking. We used our imagination, created the first “pet-rocks” to create forts and castles, read books and thought ideas through. Those disciplined habits stay with a child.

Now, going into a restaurant, I still retain discipline as well as frugality. To order the most expensive item on the menu would seem like a waste when I can be just as satisfied with less.

We have so many choices today – actually, too many. Growing up, we didn’t have the internet or 565 television channels; we played outside. Our choices were climbing trees, kicking a ball or biking. Nowadays, children play primarily inside and must decide among video games, texting their friends, checking their email or watching television.  We reap what we sow. No movement means no energy, weight gain and health challenges. Inactivity and food became our god.  Philippians 3:19.

So if God granted us instant thinness, would we appreciate it? Probably not, we certainly wouldn’t have the knowledge to choose the healthiest items at the grocery nor the discipline to maintain a healthy weight. Therefore God knows it wouldn’t be for our best.

We should earn our healthier lifestyle, it’s much more satisfying!

“I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”  (Philippians 3:14)

 

 

Are You a Godly Role Model for Your Children?

Over the years, hundreds of books were written meant to uncover why adults acted as they did.

Each touched on:

• what motivates us;, how to be successful.
• how we should view ourselves,
• what’s our “sign”
• discovering what type of personality we have: Type A, B, and so on.

Notice the common denominator? It was all about “self.” These books were written with the distinct purpose of reflecting how people should view themselves. Everyone got placed in a box, tied up with a brightly colored ribbon. Formula!

What self-centered thinking! Quite the opposite of “God First, Others Second and I Am Third.”

We are a combination of many personalities, because God created each of us uniquely. Our uniqueness makes us special. For example, my husband and I respond differently to different stimuli. I’m more impulsive, my husband’s more methodical. I need to talk it out, he needs time to think it through . . .

Therefore, it’s extremely important for each parent to discover their child’s “Love Language” also. Authors studied and targeted older generations and forgot about children.

Have you ever thought, the way we treat our children shouldn’t be the same as we treat an adult? Our children are as individual as we are. Each child has a distinctive personality and a separate need for recognition, discipline, space, acceptance and approval.

An emotional or affectionate child responds better to physical rewards such as a hug rather than a toy as a reward. He wants to know he is worth more than “things.” No amount of materialism can purchase this child’s love. He needs to be assured that he is more than simply another possession you own or he’ll turn to food or drugs for unfulfilled, comforting emotions.

One child is more analytical, another is a studious bookworm. These children desire stimulating conversation even more than hugs. Praise and respect them for their curiosity and dedication to studies (and of course hug them anyway!)

Sometimes a child only wants time with their parents, but rarely finds it. Sometimes the parents are so busy keeping up with the ‘Joneses’, working sixty-hour weeks in order to reward their child with “things” rather than what their child’s soul longs for; attention.

This creates a chasm between a child-parent relationships, perhaps one which will never fully heal. This child could even grow up to be introverted, placing a protective shell around his heart to avoid perceived abandonment issues.

Or perhaps he becomes another workaholic for his parent’s sought-after blessing. As he matures, he might want to sit and enjoy a movie, snuggling with his child, but years of training taught him that’s considered “unproductive” time. So he continues to strive for approval through hard work.

We are God’s child but do we spend time with the Lord? Think he doesn’t love us; accepts us as we are, faults and all?  Our Lord understands our Love Language! If we simply want to spend time with Him, wrapped in prayer, He’s always available to listen. If we encounter trials, we can rest in our Father’s Arms, finding comfort rather than criticism.

If we are analytical, He’ll provide knowledge and wisdom through His Word so we can understand. God’s always attuned to our needs even before we know them ourselves.

We can learn so much from our Heavenly Father. Remember that most children first identify our Heavenly Father with their earthly father. Appreciate each child as the blessing from God they truly are!

“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” (3 John 1:4)

Attempting Perfection? Ain’t Gonna Happen!

As one begins a quest for health, either through fitness or weight loss, many strive for perfection. Did you as well? How did that go? When you failed to achieve it, did you became discouraged, falter and give up?

Unfortunately, perfection is unattainable at any age. Therefore, strive for excellence, not perfection.

But why did we expect perfection from ourselves in the first place? Did we think perfection would make others like and appreciate us more? It won’t. In fact, Romans 3:10 informs us that there was only one perfect person ever born, our Lord. If you recall, most people didn’t like him much while He lived on earth and even today Jesus continues to have countless enemies.

Humans cannot be perfect no matter how hard they try. No one else is Christ. If God doesn’t expect perfection from us; only obedience, how could we possibly think we could ever become godly enough to achieve perfection?

May I remind you that God used normal, everyday imperfect human beings for his work? We tend to believe that the personalities of the Bible were superheroes, larger than life, but look again:

Abraham was old and Jeremiah was a child, Moses was timid and not a great speaker while Peter was proud and had a temper. Elijah got discouraged and Jeremiah was frequently depressed. Paul was egotistical and boastful while Jonah was a coward, David was an adulterer as well as a murderer and Solomon seemed to love women more than his LORD.

And don’t think women were any better: Sarah was a doubter, Rebekah was a schemer, Miriam was a gossip, Martha was controlling and Rahab was a prostitute!

Just as parents love their children no matter what, God loves us and desires what’s best for us. We are not perfect, but that shouldn’t give us license to be disobedient either.

Isn’t it a relief that God does not expect perfection from us to be useful to Him?! Knowing that, what does our testimony say about us? I’m quite certain you have never killed anyone but have you ever gossiped or let gluttony overcome you at a church social? Remember sin is sin in God’s eyes and His Son died for all sins; even gluttony, laziness and gossip.

Striving for excellence pleases God. How we live represents our Christian testimony. Concentrate on that aspect rather than expecting personal perfection which only frustrates and discourages. We must begin to create a strong godly example here on earth so we will hear the words, “Well done my good and faithful servant.” (Matthew 25:23)

People are watching us as an example of Christianity. Do we represent someone a non-Christian would strive to be? What strengths will we eventually bring to place at His Holy Pierced Feet?

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)        

 

Peace or Power? Which Do You Pursue?

Some who seek “peace” are actually Counterfeit Christians, striving for dominance over others. Some feel if we will simply fall in line behind them, the kingdom will have peace. This is a falsehood. True Peace, Joy, Love is only found in doing what God desires of us.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”  (Matthew 6:33)

In this life we can build up or tear down another’s hopes, dreams or self-esteem. One can profess half-truths to obtain attention or destroy another through biting words. We can be a help or we can hinder another’s godly works. We can talk ourselves into success or forge on alone, foregoing Godly Counsel.

The question is: which type of person are you? To answer that, we must go back to our roots.

If your childhood was one with a dictatorial parent, a spiteful sibling, later a dominating spouse, suffered painful abuse or loss, it’s usually masked by either a false bravado or intimidating control or it made you stronger, more compassionate and more discerning. You have a heart for others because you identify with another’s pain.

As a result, the first will either bully, tear down others through words, acting as a mean girl to overcome that sense of inferiority and insecurity of never being good enough.

The second will overcome tribulations, building godly self-esteem and through strength reach out, coming alongside others to encourage them.

In essence the first attitude is projecting “I am the master of my OWN fate! No one will ever control me again!”

The falsehood here is, we will always have someone else controlling our thoughts and actions – either God or Satan, good or evil – no other! By allowing the devil to enter our mindset and puppet us, it not only hurts us, it hurts everyone around us.

By letting go and allowing God to control our life, we become stronger, content in all things, at peace with God’s Laws, provisions, pathways.

Inferiority is like having the devil whisper, you aren’t good enough!

I have news for you: no one will EVER be good enough. In this large world someone will always be and do something better, be tougher, kinder, prettier, wealthier . . .  even cook or sing better.

That’s the purpose of explaining to my patients why mental, physiological and Spiritual health is like the Westminster Dog Show. How can one judge a Golden Retriever against a Cocker Spaniel, a Pug against a Poodle, a German Shepherd against any Terrier? You can’t. Therefore each has a different standard of individuality set down by the American Kennel Club Rule Book and are judged accordingly.

Similarly, we are all uniquely designed by God and must be judged individually accordingly to His Book: The Bible.  Are we our best according to God’s Standards? I know I’m not and yet I continually strive to be excellent in all I can to please and glorify my Lord who rules over me, whispering “You are my child. I love you. You are enough.”

As a work in progress, I recognized early in my Christian life that it’s no fun being outside of God’s Favor. In fact, it’s scary!

Personalities who don’t truly believe in themselves and feel inferior, seek to find validation by tearing others down in order to build themselves up. I suspect you know people like this. One can never build themselves up by tearing others down.

Do you search for strength, peace, wisdom, but it evades you? Stand firm for Truth! Ditch Satan’s strings – seek Godly values and discover Joy.

 

 

 

 

 

Labels- Do’s and Don’ts

What a fabulous and powerfully written post by Eat, Move, Improve by Anthony DiMarino! How often do we believe the labels placed upon us? How foolish to believe the lies and whispers of the devil telling us we are junk. God made us and God never makes junk!

Enjoy reading this motivating post and take it to heart:

EAT, MOVE, IMPROVE

Labels- we seen them everywhere.  We label people.  We label products.  We label foods.  Depending on the label we give something, it will change the meaning and the perspective we take.

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For example, we label people.  We generalize.  We label rich people as “greedy,” “grimy,” or “despicable”.  We label overweight individuals as “lazy”, “losers”, or “undisciplined”.  These labels we use create how we interact within the world.  If you see the people I outlined above in this way, would you interact with them?  Probably not.

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What if we turned this concept inward to ourselves.  If we see ourselves as “lazy”, “uncommitted”, “no good”, or “weak”, how do you think we would act?  Like losers, I’m sure.  So, why give yourself labels like that?  Consider changing the way you see things. Change the way you see others and yourself.  Choose constructive thoughts, words, and actions when viewing other people, yourself, and products.  Choose products and people that will benefit you in your mental, physical, emotional, behavioral, and…

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