Courage To Break Free

Self-assurance is a wonderful God-given gift.  I am not talking about conceit. Romans 12:3 rebukes us, “For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, . . .”

th[7]I’m speaking of confidence. With God by our side, we can conquer mountains! Joshua and Caleb did it, so can we! Conquering our insecurities is within our grasp. God wants us courageous enough to rebuke temptation but overcoming false beliefs is a challenge.

Were you allowed as a child, to voice an opinion without ridicule, or were you expected to withhold your opinion? In some families if a child spoke his mind regarding a controversial topic, there was an immediate rebuke. That subconsciously teaches a child that his feelings or opinions don’t matter and they become fearful of expressing themselves in the future. It is the same as saying; “Don’t tell me how you feel about it – that’s unimportant, just do as I say.”

No wonder people learn to fear authority and bury every emotion inside, turning to food for consolation. No one wants to be rejected and ridiculed. To discover the soothing realization that food comforts and doesn’t talk back is like a warm hug against the inner child.

Your opinions and needs matter! We are commanded to speak the truth in love but after so many years of holding the pain within, sometimes if we unlock the floodgates,  frustration recklessly spews out all at once. Have you ever yelled at your spouse or child and it had absolutely nothing to do with them? Usually the cause turns out to be a subconscious painful memory.

When Julie was newly married, her husband playfully teased her about her eating habits. This struck her the wrong way and she lashed out at him. It seems Julie’s father was a malicious, belittling man who consistently taunted and shamed her at the dinner table. A flash of memory and her husband became the recipient of that hurtful recollection. Sometimes people have no idea why you act as you do and since humans are not mind-readers one must open up, conveying their innermost feelings to begin trusting again.

Choose to Release Your Emotional Bondage, Breaking that Chain:

  • Stay in the Word. Memorize Scripture. It’s remarkable how a Bible verse will come to mind when needed most.
  • Speak the Truth in love. Look at the intent of the one who tries your patience. Was it intentional or is someone simply unaware of your past?
  • Gather the courage to divulge how a statement made you feel.  If you can disclose those personal moments, such as “my father made fun of me in public too,” most will understand. If not, find more compassionate friends.
  • Positive affirmations matter. You are special to God simply because you exist!
  • You are important to your family. They love you and you should feel comfortable revealing who you are. If not, speak to a pastor, counselor or trusted friend.
  • When under stress, don’t eat – exercise, go for a walk, read or search for relaxation outside because fresh air creates feel-good endorphins. Be proactive. Choose healthy ways to release the frustration.

Put yourself in another’s shoes.  Humans aren’t mind readers and if you don’t express yourself, how would they know? Burying your feelings will only kick the can down the road.

“Don’t be afraid, because I’m with you; don’t be anxious, because I am your God. I keep on strengthening you; I’m truly helping you. I’m surely upholding you with my victorious right hand.”  Isaiah 41:10 (ISV)


4 thoughts on “Courage To Break Free

  1. Very True Ellie, a beautiful message, thank you and yes, hurt people hurt people and themselves, this can be with excess food as you shared, it makes them feel better, although we can’t judge that this is always the reason they are overweight, as we know other physical problems can cause it.

    Hurt people also abuse themselves with drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, even excessive exercise etc No we do not accept these as OK, God doesn’t but we have compassion for those who are hurting, the same as He does and did with us.

    With Blogging we also see those who are hurting and even as Christians they can do and say things to hurt others, perhaps their Childhood was as you described Ellie or they just rejected correction, they may have had Marriage problems, the flesh is very stubborn but we are still to be the Salt, we don’t water down God’s Truth or let others do it either but we do share knowing they need Jesus to heal them too. If they abuse us ie delete us, ignore us etc, we may need to rebuke them but it still leaves us no choice, we move on but we still pray for them in Love, knowing we needed healing too.

    Colossians 4:5 Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

    Yes it is True Ellie, when we know who we are in Christ Jesus and that our identity is in Him and just how much we are Loved, than we will also know we are people of great worth.

    Christian Love from us both – Anne


  2. Well thank you Anne. Your points are well made. It grieves me when I see some suffering and not having the faith to turn over their weighty problems to the Lord, who can comfort them.

    I always appreciate your thoughtful comments. Too bad that there are too many factors that go into the entire mind, body, spirit connection to discuss them here. I have written extensively about these topics before however. I’m looking forward to when my book is published. Blessings,


  3. Yes so True Ellie not enough space for me either to share a lifetime but we share what’s important, I know most just want short and sweet but God’s Truth has meat, best wishes with your book.

    As we know suffering and hardship can block our view that is why God tells to………….

    2 Corinthians 1:3-5 Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.

    Galatians 6:2 Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

    Romans 12:15 Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.

    Blessings – Anne


  4. Thank you Ellie for all we have shared together, it’s a blessing to know you, the ups and downs of weight control is indeed a very Loooooooooooooooooog subject that we may never reach the end of but I have enjoyed sharing together the ups and downs with you.

    See you after our Holidays, Blessings – Anne


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